Early Morning Hours


Always something to stress over,
always something to weigh on the mind,
the mind, a fragile piece of equipment
responsible for what holds all the knowledge
needed to give adequate care.
I need to do well in this rotation,
What can I do that will make me stand out as the
pillar of knowledge I so desperately try to be.
Oh no, why did I say that?  That was dumb.
Oh well, better luck next time with trying to make a good impression.
But I do read, I say to myself.  As I think about what the upcoming evaluation will say.
Be more aggressive, talk more during rounds, ask more questions, read more.
If only they could read my mind and know how long I have worked, prayed and dreamed
about this opportunity.
Tossing and turning with these thoughts, I realize
it’s 7 a.m., time to go do rounds.  Leaving the call room I
remember the words of my
resident the night before.  “This attending is tough.  Make sure
you know everything about
your patient, you want to impress him.”
Always something to stress over,
Peace be still.

Eugenia Sanders

University of Illinois College of Medicine