Helpless

The bright bedroom lights stare down at me
Where am I?
The tile is warm, but my fingers are cold
HELP!!
Darkness overcomes me again

The walls are blue
A nurse stares down at me
What happened?
60/30, is that bad?

Bright red stains spot my sheets
My colon failed me
The bleeding has stopped
Helpless.
I’m 50, but I feel 100 years old
The nurses keep drawing blood
Haven’t I lost enough already?

Do I need surgery?
Is it cancer?
I’m too young to die
Can somebody just tell me what’s wrong?

I can’t sleep…I’m tired
The machines hum and beep
Two nurses laugh next door
Can I have some QUIET PLEASE?!!

I need to get out of here
Perhaps I can yank out these tubes
Change back into my clothes and run!
Just like the movies
Bust out of this jail
Freedom!

Seema Pasha, Class of 2005